Living Ideology: Being Happy for Others is Hard (…or — My Daughter Won a Car!)
Every year Tim Horton’s has their Roll Up the Rim event. Millions of Canadians, over a one month period, slurp coffee and then roll up the rim of their cup to see if they won a prize… usually it’s a free donut or coffee. However, while at college one particular morning, Shelby rolled up her rim and it said “Winner – Camry.” An one in over six million chance of winning a car and it’s my daughter! She told the story countless times since then, the initial excitement of her friends, the other students, the Tim Horton’s staff where she made the purchase and many many many people asking to take selfies with her. It was pretty exciting. During the six week wait for the car to arrive, however, proved to be somewhat of an interesting study of human nature. Many people were happy for her that she won… many people told her directly she didn’t deserve to win… many people told her they deserved it more than she did… even some of my own friends made it-must-be-nice comments. It lead to many conversations in our home about jealousy and how to deal with these sorts of responses. Shelby was at some points wishing she hadn’t won the car, saying it wasn’t worth the stress. Because Shelby got the luck of the draw, should she feel guilty? She didn’t work for that car. She bought a cup of coffee. No. Of course that makes no logical sense. The day the car arrived, all the issues were put aside and the excitement built up.
Rolling a Rim and winning a car is pure luck, nothing else. We do recognize all the people who were genuinely happy for her. I just don’t understand why some people can’t just be happy for others?